CD 12.
I had my ultrasound to check my follicle growth this morning, and I left work early so I could shower and such beforehand.The ultrasound was at 8:20 and I seriously love my RE's Nurse Practitioner. She is so sweet, and even offered to take extra photos for me if there were good follicles so A could see them, since he wasn't able to get off work in time to come with me.
Crazy thing is, I had the terrible abdominal pain very early in the morning on the 26th, (I was at work at the time) and I actually had to go downstairs to take some Tylenol to relieve the pain. My ovaries hurt so bad! After about an hour, the pain was gone, and by the time the tylenol wore off, the pain was gone. I haven't felt ANYTHING down there since.
I texted A this morning that I had the worst feeling that I ovulated early because of that pain, and my ovaries were not hurting like they were last month on just the Femara.
Anyway, back to my ultrasound - My lining was "absolutely perfect," (in the nurse practitioner's own words). Next she checked my right ovary - Not a single follicle in sight. Nothing. There was a tiny what she called 'cyst' that could have had a follicle, but just didn't grow. So we went over to the left!
And there was nothing. There were empty sacs, and she called them "corpus luteum." Here's a quick explanation I found online about what a corpus luteum is:
"The corpus luteum, which means yellow body in Latin, is what is left of
the follicle after a woman ovulates. During the follicular phase of a
woman’s cycle, several follicles develop under the influence of FSH
(follicle stimulating hormone). Each follicle contains an egg. In a
typical cycle only one egg will become mature enough for ovulation. When
a woman ovulates the egg will burst from the follicle. Then what is
left of the follicle will become the corpus luteum.
The corpus luteum produces progesterone. Progesterone
makes the lining of the uterus thick for implantation and is necessary
to sustain a healthy pregnancy. The corpus luteum produces progesterone
until the placenta begins to take over progesterone production around
ten weeks gestation."
So basically, from what she saw today, she thinks I ovulated yesterday, probably at the time I was having the bad pain in my abdomen, and from the looks of the corpus luteum's, and the thickness of my lining, she thinks it was a REALLY good egg, and that my body realized it as such and decided to do what it's supposed to do, and release it. So I guess that's good news, but I'm hitting myself for turning down A's advances yesterday because I was thinking about him having a good count if we got to go through with an IUI. We did "get together" twice on Tuesday, so now all I get to do is cross my fingers that somehow there were dudes up there fighting to fertilize that 'good' egg.
I feel like I'm searching for hope in the dark now, and yet, I know I'll just continue to keep looking.
-J
CD7.
I started my menopur injections today - It went.. well. I seriously just hate needles! Of course, A had to give it to me once again! I think he secretly likes to do it, haha.
I got a SUPER awesome surprise on Friday when I called our insurance companies pharmacy to pay for the Ovidrel shot + the Menopur. I previously thought it would be around $500 for three months worth, which would be roughly $167 a month.
Not so. We ended up paying $46.67 for one month, plus two extra vials of Menopur. I was shocked. Excited, but totally shocked. I am SO thankful that our insurance company covers this. Such a huge weight off my shoulders! So we celebrated :)
Here's a photo of what I'm looking at this month - Seems scary!
I don't really have much to update - I know that last cycle, I started getting nauseous after I took my last femara pill, and this cycle I was on day 3 of femara and I started getting sick to my stomach. I sometimes think I feel twinges in my ovaries, but I had that last month as well, and only had one follicle to show for it. So I guess we will see! I hate to say this, but I'm so so hopeful for this cycle. Hope can be your best friend, but it can also be somewhat of a curse. Its kind of the thing that lets me down, but builds me back up month after month.
Right now, its building me up. I'm still crossing my fingers that it doesn't let me fall like so many other things have.
-J
Last cycles verdict was, as usual, a huge negative. I was technically two days late - But got a negative HPT on Feb. 15th before starting my cycle on Feb. 16.
I called my RE's office on Monday, and they wanted me to come in on Tuesday to discuss a new plan, which was introducing hMG injections along with the Femara + Ovidrel shot. I made an appt. for Tues. at 2pm and as soon as I got off the phone I began researching hMG injections, and I immediately did NOT like what I was seeing.
$2000 to $5000 for EVERY cycle? At this point I was defeated, overwhelmed and just tired.
We went to the appt. the next day, and had the consultation with the office's nurse practioner and she was super sweet and very informative. She went over costs, and gave us some other purchasing options - If we went through a specialty pharmacy, we could get the medication for $90 a dose instead of $110 to $200 a dose, and also get the Ovidrel for $110 instead of $150. Any kind of savings is awesome in my opinion. We also asked her about insemination due to Andrew possibly going to Atlanta for an entire month - She told us that would be $408 (not bad at all!) and they would offer the procedure anyway if we had good follicles produced! We might decide to go with that anyway, since she said A's sperm analysis was amazing, and we could have a really good chance with IUI because its usually only offered for both female and male factor infertility.
We are definitely keeping that in mind. Before the end of the consultation, she told us to call our insurance company to make sure that they would not cover ANY of the costs of the medication before she went ahead and sent in our prescription to the specialty pharmacy.
I didn't expect to get anything at all - but we tried anyway. To my complete and utter shock, they COVER it. We got Menopur for $50 and the Ovidrel for $90. Those prices are for three months! We'll be spending just over $500 for three months of medication (hopefully we won't need three more months) whereas we would have been paying close to $2000 per month. I could not have been more happy yesterday. :)
I'm pretty excited. I think having a future plan helps the grieving process when you get a BFN. I have something to look forward too, and I have hope to hold on too.
Anyway, the plan is Femara CD3-7, and Menopur CD7-12 possibly to CD13 with Ovidrel on CD12 or CD13. I have an ultrasound on the 27th of this month to see how my follicles are growing. I'm keeping my fingers crossed extra hard.
-J
This feels like the longest 2ww to have ever happened in history. And I am still only 7dpo. I still have an entire week left until testing or a new cycle. Ever since the hospital, I've been itching like crazy to see if the ovidrel shot is out of my system. Must. Show. Restraint.
It does me no good testing now anyway. Most sites say implantation wouldn't happen until at least 9dpo, so if anything came up positive now, it would definitely still be the ovidrel. Whats the point then?
I've been reaaally sick the past week as mentioned before and out of the days I'm supposed to work, I only worked one day for a grand total of 5hrs and 20minutes before they sent me home on account of looking like death warmed over. I've been really scared about what the medication might do IF there was any action going on down there, so I made sure everything they gave me was pregnancy friendly just in case. I would hate to not error on the side of caution and mess things up!
I haven't had any 'symptoms' yet - I have noticed a lot more CM this cycle than ever before, but usually only when I wipe (sorry TMI?). My boobs are sore on the sides which is normal for this time. I've had a pulling feeling (not really cramping) that just started today, but again, normal for this time. A is super hopeful for this month, and I think it might just be because he applied for a higher position within his job, and he heard from another guy that helps in the hiring that he got it in a round about way. Basically, the guy saw him, and said 'Hey, aren't you leaving for training soon?' so - I take that as he knows something A doesn't.
IF he gets the position, though, he will be training in Atlanta, GA for an entire month, which means that's just another month lost for us. I can't even think about being home alone for an entire month. The last time we were away from each other that long was.. 8+ years ago. Scary! It will be really good for him though. He works really hard, so he definitely deserves it!
Anyway, good luck to everyone still, and never give up on your dream.
-J
I updated the look of the blog, which I'm sure you've noticed! I had a little time on my hands, and it IS a new year, so I figured why not.
Aside from re-doing the blog, I've been in pain the last few days - Finally it got to be too much for me to handle, so A took me to the emergency room. I KNEW it had to be kidney stones from the location (I've had them before, but haven't had one in over 2 years!). I told them I was on fertility medication and that if I took a urine test right now, it might come back positive, but they gave one to me anyway.
Of course, it was positive. They decided to take my blood and check to see how much HCG was in my blood stream, and they could make a decision from there if they would follow through with the cat scan to see if the kidney stone was causing a blockage or what. My beta came back at 25, which is right on course for a pregnancy that is about 1 week along, but she also said it could be the trigger so they were not going to do the cat scan. I'm 100% firm that it WAS the trigger, since the pregnancy test came back positive as well. There's no way implantation happened that fast.
Anyway, their next move was to give me a kidney ultrasound, but I would have to wait until 9am that morning (Basically, they sent me home with pain meds and nausea meds until 9am) and they released me at 1am. By 4:30am I was throwing up (TMI sorry) and couldn't keep any of my pain medication down. The pain was now worse than before, so A took me right back to the ER. We were there for a bit, and finally got my ultrasound which finally showed kidney stones. I left with pain meds, more nausea pills, and a prescription for 'flomax' which helps your tubes connecting the kidney and bladder to open up so stones don't get caught up in there!
I had an eye doctors appt. yesterday as well, and had taken a pain pill right when we were getting ready to leave. 10 minutes later and I felt like I was going to throw up. I was hoping they would be quick.. Sitting in the room waiting for the Dr. and I was like 'I need that trash now!' - A got the nurse and the nurse grabbed the Dr. to get in my room and make it quick. I'm sooo glad he was understanding since he JUST went through kidney stones himself. My appt. was super quick, which I was thankful for, and I had a photo finish running through the house to the downstairs bathroom to throw up. So, I figured out at this point it was the medication that was causing me to be sick. My family Dr. called me in a different prescription that is waaay better.
I'm supposed to go back to work tonight, but I don't know if I'll be making it - I'm still queasy and dizzy. I guess we'll see how it goes!
-J
Another short post - Just wanted to update! I took my trigger on the 29th of January (CD13) so we're counting today (Feb. 2) as 2dpo! I've had nausea since my last femara pill on Jan. 23rd (CD7), and the day after the trigger, it was 10x worse! Every time I eat I feel like its about to come back up. I read online that sometimes the side effects of the trigger can last up to two weeks after the shot. Maybe if we're lucky it will continue, and we'll finally have a BFP?!
I'll be totally honest - I am not feeling this cycle. I think it has a LOT to do with this being our first cycle on a new medication, first time using the Ovidrel, etc., and I have read faaaar too many posts about how I shouldn't expect my body to respond the first time I take a new drug. Or maybe its let down after let down after let down that has severely damaged my optimism? Who knows.
I have plans to test on Feb. 14th, since that will be 14DPO, IF my cycle hasn't started.A and I do NOT celebrate Valentines Day, but maybe we could actually have something to celebrate this year. I probably will not test before then, only because of the risk of a false BFP due to the Ovidrel, and because I don't want to psyche myself out. I hate how my heart starts to beat out of my chest every time I take a test, whether or not I even THINK there's a possibility of being pregnant. It makes me anxious to even think about testing right now haha :)
I'm still suuuper nauseous, my nipples are sore, my boobs only hurt when they get smushed against something (a hug, our dogs, etc.). I haven't noticed any fatigue, but my ovaries have hurt like hell. Mainly the left one, which is crazy to me since none of my follicles were a good grade on that side.
I read online that eating the core of a pineapple (just one slice a day for 5 days) can help with implantation due to the bromelain in it so I figured why not try it! I'll pretty much try anything right now. I tried to eat 1 tiny circular piece of the core starting on 1dpo, but on top of hating pineapples to begin with, I got to the third small bite (trying to choke it down) and actually started to throw up in our kitchen sink. So, I'm going to try the pineapple SLICE today (not the core) since it still has bromelain in it, just not as much, and see how that goes. I figured I'll just choke it down and hope I don't lose it!
Anway - I always leave my posts with a picture and it just so happens that I made the picture for this post, and I pinned it to my infertility board on Pinterest if you want to save it! Its from a book by Kathryn Mackel called 'The Surrogate' - Which isn't too bad so far. Here's my pinterest:
http://www.pinterest.com/jennuuh/
If you follow, I will definitely follow back!
Good luck to everyone still waiting, just like me.
(I realize this goes outside the border, but its impossible to read if it doesn't!)
-J
(P.S. Nadine - I wrote in my letter that we don't have postcards here in Toledo, so on the original envelope I had drew a picture on it - Since it got sent back, I had to scrap the original envelope and while I had intentions to do it to the second envelope, I ended up sending it in post office envelope instead. Hopefully it gets to you soon - There is a 'good luck' charm of sorts inside - I hope you like it!)
